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“You’re only renting because you don’t have kids.”
“Your lifestyle doesn’t work for families.”
“You’ll change your tune when you have a baby.”
We’ve been hearing variations of these from friends and family every time we tell them we’re still renting even after 10 years into our early retirement adventure. For the longest time, there was this perception that our nomadic lives only made sense because we didn’t have children and were, therefore, irresponsible and selfish. We’d have to smarten up and settle down, they assured us, if we ever had a kid.
Well, now we have one, and it’s been over a year. We are no longer a carefree couple with no responsibilities. We now have to care about pediatrician appointments and school districts, and proximity to playgrounds, which is something we never even thought about before.
So has this changed our perspective? Has the nesting instinct hit us? Did Little Matchstick turn us into Home Boners?
Surprisingly, no! If anything, becoming parents has convinced us even more about the wisdom of renting versus owning.
How is that possible? Well…
Homes Are High Maintenance
We have never owned real estate directly ourselves, but everyone we talk to about it tells us one thing repeatedly: It’s a lot of work.
Not only do you have to keep it clean and tidy, you’re responsible for mowing the lawn, keeping your hedges trimmed, keeping the deck from rotting, fixing your fence. The list goes on and on, and if you step just a little out of line with your grass cutting, some annoying busybody from the neighbourhood HOA is always watching, watching and waiting to make trouble for you.
And that’s just normal maintenance. If something goes wrong, like a pipe burst or the roof starts leaking, there’s no landlord to call and complain. It’s your problem, and these issues can’t be ignored, delayed, or deferred because if you do, they just get worse and more difficult to fix later.
Don’t get me wrong, if you’re super handy around the house like Mr. Money Mustache and genuinely enjoy swinging hammers and breaking out the circular saw, great! You should definitely own, because you’re probably going to do a great job keeping the place in tip-top shape.
FIRECracker and I are not one of those people. A home shouldn’t be a project, it should be a place to hang your hat so that you can spend your life energy on things that actually interest you, like raising your rambunctious and curious toddler, or writing books.
Price Stability
Stability is the siren call of every homeowner justifying their decision to buy. Owning, they reason, means you never have to deal with an annoying landlord. It means you never have to worry about being evicted if your landlord decides to sell. And stability is critical to the emotional development of a baby, right?
I actually agree that stability is important, but not the kind of stability that home owners usually think about, because renting gives me the stability that I really crave…price stability.
Owning real estate may give people stability in terms of physical location, in that you can live at that location for as long as you want and (generally) you can’t be kicked out of it, but for finance nerds like us, all I see when it comes to owning real estate is risk.
There’s the risk that your mortgage payment can unexpectedly change, something the Americans were shocked to discover can happen in 2008, and Canadians are now realizing as mortgages are being renewed at rates far greater than when they signed their purchase agreements. There’s the risk that a pipe bursts, or a crack appears in the foundation, which can set you back tens of thousands of dollars in repair costs. There’s the risk that the city can increase their property tax assessments, putting you on the hook for increased tax bills. The list goes on and on.
When you rent, your living costs are fixed to basically one number: your monthly rent. And many cities have rules that limit how much a landlord can increase their rent each year. Property taxes may still increase, costly repairs can still happen, but that’s your landlord’s problem, not the tenant’s.
This makes budgeting far easier, because I have much more certainty over my monthly spending. This makes it easier to save money and grow our portfolio, since what I project at the beginning of the year tends to actually come true at the end of it.
Having a baby makes this price stability even more important, since kids are a source of price instability all on their own. The baby won’t latch properly? Guess we’re buying hundreds of dollars of formula now until that gets fixed. The baby going through a growth spurt and just ate an entire weeks of baby food all at once? Well, guess what’s happening to your food budget! The baby needs extra vaccinations that your insurance doesn’t cover? Guess who’s paying for that out-of-pocket!
All this stuff happened to us, and from talking to other parents, these are very common baby-related expenses that happen randomly. And since we’re both first time parents, we didn’t know what we didn’t know and couldn’t budget for any of them.
The saving grace is that while these baby-related expenses can add up, the financial damage that adds up tends to be in the range of hundreds of dollars, not tens of thousands like real estate.
If FIRECracker and I were dealing with all this baby-related firefighting, and then our pipe burst in the middle of the night, I’m honestly not sure how we would deal with it.
So grateful to be renters.
It’s Harder To Travel
OK this one is totally a FIRECracker and Wanderer thing, but owning/renting is a personal choice, so this factors into our decision.
We love to travel. Little Matchstick has been to seven countries already, and he isn’t even two yet! While I wouldn’t say that we subscribe to a specific parenting philosophy, travelling with LMS and exposing him to as many different languages, cultures, and ways of life is a priority for us.
Which begs the question, what should we do with our place while we’re gone?
Keeping our rent low makes this decision a lot easier. Right now, we’re paying $1600 a month, and if we need to leave the place empty for a month or two, that’s not going to break the bank versus a mortgage payment that’s double or triple that.
Plus, it’s a lot easier to share our place with other travellers using platforms like HomeExchange if our place is a small (but comfy) apartment located in a city centre rather than a house out in the suburbs. There are a lot more single travellers and couples that we can swap with.
Another unexpected benefit of renting is that ironically, the law tends to be more on your side when it comes to sharing platforms. We could theoretically own a condo in the middle of the city, but the way the laws are writing in Ontario, Canada, condo boards wield a surprising amount of power over what you can and can’t do with your property. If the condo board decides to ban overnight guests, or sharing platforms like AirBnb and HomeExchange, they’re perfectly in their right to do so. And if you get caught violating their rules, they can fine you and put a lien on your property. This, despite the fact that you supposedly “own” your place. Who owns who here?
Rental laws here, on the other hand, are far more advantageous to the renter. Even if it’s written on your lease that you can’t share your place, the laws of the city where you live override that.
To be fair, we always give our landlord a heads up when someone stays in our place while we travel because we want to be good tenants and maintain a good relationship with them, and we limit the turnover by only having long term home exchangers a few times a year.
Owning gives you more control over certain things, but ironically less control over others.
Conclusion
At the end of the day, being on Team Rent or Team Own is a personal decision, and the right answer for one may not be the right answer for another. It all depends on your values.
FIRECracker and I value money and freedom, specifically freedom to travel with Little Matchstick as much as possible. They say becoming a parent changes your priorities, but even after having him, we’ve found these core values haven’t changed. In fact, if anything they’ve become even stronger.
So, for the three of us, we are firmly on the side of Team Rent for the forseeable future.
How about you? Are you on Team Rent or Team Own, and why? Let’s hear it in the comments below!
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This sounds backwards to me, so I think it’s important to note that renting may be more beneficial in certain cities more than others, and it’s dependent on many factors! My husband and I own a large apartment in Queens, NYC; it’s in a historic co-op building, which means we pay a monthly maintenance fee and we have a building superintendent (who does all the sidewalk cleaning and helps with all the plumbing/electrical disasters that might come up!). It’s such low overhead for us that we too are able to travel freely–we bought here in 2008, at a time when our rent in Brooklyn was $1650/month and rising every year. Today our monthly mortgage payment is just $1000. The maintenance fee started around $500/month and has creeped up to $800, but that took 16 years! Rents in NYC are notorious for skyrocketing, and even “rent-stablized” buildings are going up this year. It’s also not uncommon for a landlord here to just sell their whole building to a developer and then everyone living there is out.
We do have friends who have successfully managed to rent in Manhattan with their two kids (we have two as well), but they are paying 3-4x more than we are. We have other friends who sublet the place they own in one Brooklyn neighborhood to rent in another with better schools and bigger apartments. In our case though, I feel like owning our place is a wonderful investment we will likely pass on to our kids one day.
That’s because you’re comparing a place you bought 17 years ago with today’s rents and completely disregarding the opportunity cost of all that equity trapped in the property that could be earning a yield if invested in the stockmarket.
If your friends took the money they would’ve spent on a house and invested it over the past last 17 years, they can easily sustain a higher rent and be just as well off financially because their portfolio pays them and as a result subsidizes their rent.
Ha, well, then there’s the problem of renting in NYC period … many people who rent here are not able to also sizeably invest in the stock market. We have invested plenty, however, with the money we saved by living in the apartment we’ve owned for 17 years for a very low monthly fee! Our apartment has also doubled in value.
You could have the rent v. own argument time and again, but the fact is the location really plays a role.
totally agree
The choice of own vs rent can be as polarizing as politics. I’m personally on “Team Rent” also. The idea of owning a home sounds like the very definition of hell. But… I do realize that people who have the classic “handy-man” type skills or instincts, homeownership can be good.
… JL Collins said it best, “…rent yourself a nice place. Let the landlord worry about fixing the f*cking toilet”.
True, although JL DID buy a house!
The key here is that your rent is $1600 which is very unlikely in a place like Toronto. If the rent was almost same the same as your mortgage would your personal preference still be renting ? Since you could afford to buy the home with cash and your monthly home expense would 60% of your rent. Would you still rent ?
Also owning gives you the ability to have a bigger place than renting. At some point in time you might need a bigger place to accommodate your child.
But at the end of day if works for you then this great. Every family is different with their own unique needs.
Taxes, maintenance, and higher insurance costs as well as buying and selling transaction fees also come in. Those transaction fees are brutal and part of what makes it difficult to adjust your housing needs over time. For example, we rent a larger place because we have two kids but rented a smaller place when I was just us and when our oldest was a baby. This lets our rent and other costs (heat, electricity, etc) scale to our needs more easily. Cost of moving is like $2-3k for movers. On the other hand, just real estate transaction fees alone can eat like $50k
If I am honest with myself, I wish I were still renting. I loved my little apartment that felt more like a condo. Traveling has always been at the top of my priorities as far as where I spend my money goes. However, I knew I wanted to own in my hometown area and bought due to skyrocketing prices. In hindsight, I should’ve held off as I’m realizing owning in the area has not trumped my desire for travel and flexibility, something I wish I would’ve put more thought into from the beginning.
I bought my first place in 2023. Haven’t loved it but learned a ton. Hope to return to team rent in a few years if my wife will be up for it. I actually don’t regret buying just for the experience and getting up the learning curve and being forced to become more handy.
We transitioned from Team Own to Team Rent five years ago and have never looked back. To be fair, our kids are gone and we’re retired but renting has been great for us, even though we live in the US where we can get 30-year fixed mortgages. When we factored in the property taxes (stupid high in Texas), insurance (again, stupid high), ongoing maintenance, and amortized expected regular one-time requirements (new HVAC every 12 years; new roof every 25), renting was the clear winner. This is not even including the “opportunity cost” of tying up capital to invest in real estate rather than other more flexible investments – nor the “sudden” and unexpected maintenance costs like burst pipes or new sprinkler heads. If you plan to live and die in the same place, buying might make sense but I’m not sure it’s about economics. For us, flexibility with time and place is much more important.
I don’t like mortgage renew thing in Canada where you never know how much you will pay in 5 years. Also, I see my friend who owns and house poor.
We rent in Canada. It works for us. No pain with maintenance and unexpected bills in regards of owning place. No property taxes which every year just continue increasing.
If you can rent for the same price as a mortgage, are you not better to own a property? Ok, yes you will have maintenance bills etc. but to be honest, they are not astronomically high and, in the UK, we have insurance for any emergencies, again not that high every year. I get the investment part and letting it grow for 15 years etc. but if you only have around 5 or 10% down payment on a mortgage, it won’t grow that much. If you buy in the right location, your property value should increase each year offsetting any big bills etc. and just now mortgage rates are lowish, if you fix for 5 or 10 years, you can budget and still invest the savings. I think each to their own but for me buying has worked, but maybe into retirement I can rent out my house and downsize and rent a smaller place, still making a profit to invest or use as a extra pension money.
Conclusion, as always- Do the math!
We rented for a very, VERY, long time, and I wish we bought sooner. In our area (New England), the prices only ever go up. Sometimes slower, sometimes faster.
We now pay a monthly amount (mortgage plus taxes) on a house, and it’s roughly equivalent to the rent we charge for a condo we own.
Because the 30-year mortgage in the us doesn’t change, the taxes do go up, but the rents go waaay up.
Now, for us – long-term travel is not a priority. Community of people we can walk to is. A good school, with kids all leaving in the neighborhood and knowing each other for a few years is. It s especially critical in the US, because they mix classes every year, so it’s harder to stay in touch with your friends if you don’t live close by.
And that’s before we’re talking about equity. Our rental condo now pays for itself, including repairs, all the while appreciating. And if we won’t want to sell it, it can someday serve the next generation. Or they can sell or rent it, what would make sense.
Rent vs. Own is not a one-size-fits-all decision. But I don’t subscribe to the “never own!” philosophy. In some cases and some markets, that’s the more financially sound choice.
Great article, Wanderer! As you indicate, there are lots of factors to consider, and each person’s situation is different.
I would love to be on team rent, but here in Calgary, a lot of rentals are owned by individual landlords, and their circumstances, like anyone’s, can change, meaning that they can decide to sell the place all of the sudden.
Once we had kids, we felt that we needed the stability of being in one place and not having the place sold out from under us, so we bought. Thank goodness Calgary isn’t as crazy expensive other major cities in Canada.
I think it’s awesome that Millennial Revolution has encouraged people to consider renting, and do the math.
Way too much home ownership propaganda in our society!
I bought my first house in 2009, 1st 2 rentals in the following 4 years and sold them all in 2018 for double what I bought it for minus rent which covered mortgage, rates, insurance, agent fees and maintenance. Here in NZ a portion of the costs could be reclaimed as expenses so my tax return yearly would be around $15,000. I bought do up houses requiring cosmetic work mostly for very cheap prices so my mortgage was low and got a company to come fortnightly to mow the lawns and general care of the exterior which again I can claim back as an expense. A pipe leaked in 1 of the houses and my agent got it fixed quickly, and I claimed it against my insurance. I had a good agent who did a thorough background check before renting out my houses and had only 1 time a tenant defaulted on rent due to job loss but paid up once he got a new job. I rented for 7 years when I moved to the big Auckland city and due to high rents had to flatshare and it was noisy, food was constantly eaten by others, and I did not have any privacy. Living alone in an apartment would triple my expenses so I eventually sold my 3 properties and bought a 4 bedroom do upper house in 2019 for a small mortgage just in time for Covid 19 when rents went sky high until 2022. Initially, I rented out the rooms in my house after renovations, but I got to choose my flatmates and it was great. Then I got a 2-bedroom unit done in my backyard and moved in and live rent free now as my house tenants pay all costs relating to my house. I am 40 now and most of my income goes into ETFs and small holidays for the last 5 years and I will retire in 3 years with more than I need. I plan to sell up and move to the country, build a small house and live there in summer months and travel in the colder ones. Personally, I did not understand stock markets, and it was expensive buying through brokers in NZ when I was young. I only learned about ETFs and stock markets in 2015 and it was still expensive and not a lot of ETFs being offered by the few NZ companies then. The few years I rented were horrible, rents kept going up every 6 months and sometimes the landlords just asked us to leave so they can renovate and relist for a higher rent. Moving all the time cost money and there were all these rules so I could not furnish or decorate the places as I like to make me feel comfortable. Looking back I will still choose to own rather than rent.
Excellent read! Thank you!!
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I have the smartest dad in the world. Since I was young he told me never buy a house. Rent and be free.
Couldn’t agree more even now that I’m 47 married and 2 kids
I was Team Rent for a long time and then we had a kid. Lived in a small, 520 square foot apartment–rent around $2300 in DC area. We bought in 2019 before rates went up and prices went up. Then refinanced at 2.65% in 2020. Buying was one of the best decisions we’ve ever made. Our total escrow payment is less than what many in this area pay for one bedrooms and definitely less than two bedrooms–nice ones but not even super luxury in this area. We did have to move a bit further out but it’s great with now two kids. We bought new construction also so the maintenance and repairs have been minimal–like HVAC repairs and a new dishwasher. Property taxes go up but even large increases are more like $100 maybe every few years even with price appreciation.
I don’t agree with the bloggers here–excellent people and great book–it really depends on when, where, how you buy. For us the decision was just awesome, one of the best decisions we’ve ever made. The price stability with a low mortgage rate and minimal property tax increases is way better than the variable rental market in DC–with alot of price increases over the past few years. So you really do LOCK IN a generally stable price over 15 to 30 years–something the authors overlooked.
I can certainly see if you are transient and travel as much as the great bloggers here do, yes. And yes, you are responsible for maintenance and repairs–but as a first time homeowner who thought I’d stress–it’s pretty easy to find competent people through yelp, google, or your friends and neighbors. And you learn how to do it and get used to it–the amount that we’ve spent on repairs and maintenance over 6 years is less than $6k. New house though. Having way, way more space with two kids and a stable place is the biggest thing.
At the end of the day though–we bought with great, great timing before prices and interest rates went way up. If we were buying today the math would be way different.
But with two small kids–yes, having the stability in where we live, the space, and payment is wonderful.
You can still travel if you own a home.
Just rent it out to someone else for the income.
Usually a home in a good neighborhood will increase in value.
There are some invalid assertions in this post.
“Property taxes may still increase, costly repairs can still happen, but that’s your landlord’s problem, not the tenant’s.”
Hmm. Are you sure the landlord won’t pass on those problems to you the tenant? That’s just naive.
Also, owning a home does not prevent you from traveling. Not sure why you would assume that.
I am 61 years old and 5 years ago I became 90% retired. I love this blog, and the book. I read “Your money or your life” when it was first published when I was about 30. It changed my life, as I am sure that this blog has changed many other lives. I am Canadian but have lived in England, Switzerland, and South Africa. I have travelled to over 100 countries. At the age of 50 we paid cash for a reasonably priced house in small town Ontario to provide a base for my 3 children. It was the best use of money I could ever imagine. My investments for the previous decade were so-so. In the last 12 years the value of my house has tripled. My other investments have not done as well. My children have grown up in a community that they love. They have made lifelong friends. They know that we never plan to sell the house and it will always be a place that they can return to in times of need or of celebration. We all look forward to having family gatherings here for decades to come and we plan for the kids to inherit the house to use it as a summer home (it is waterfront). We don’t need to worry about inflation on housing/renting. We can live on a very minimal cost for housing forevermore. Our property tax has gone from about $350 a month to $400 a month in the last twelve years. This has kept our living costs very low, allowing us to retire with a much lower number for our savings. If we ever do need more cash, we will rent out part of our house, which would cover all of our expenses. Now that our kids are in University we have been travelling extensively again. We have no problem closing up the house and taking off. What I can’t fully explain is the emotional bliss that we have with a fully paid house that we truly love. A place that we know we will always have. We can improve it if we like, knowing we will reap all the benefits of any work we do. Roots can be a wonderful thing, even if you enjoy travelling. Just my 2 cents worth.
Some thoughts on the stability issue-
I think that, since the majority of the adult population probably want to be homeowners (and there is also all the social pressure) that statistically speaking, the majority of adult renters are those who can’t buy a home (of course, there exceptions to this).
And, also statistically speaking, those who can’t buy a home, tend to be further down the socioeconomic ladder, than those who can.
And, folks further down the socioeconomic ladder tend to have statistically greater exposure to other issues in life, such as intermittent or unreliable income, exposure to violent crime, family members absent from their lives, and so forth. Again, I’m talking about statistical averages, not individual people’s stories which will of course vary.
So! We hear a lot about how kids who grow up in an apartment “lack stability” in their lives… Could it be, though, that the lack of stability stems from those other issues? Not the renting itself?
I sure hope so, because I’ve got twin 7 year olds and I don’t want to ever own a house again.
While all your reasons are valid and I agree with them, there’s one more I can think of. Buying a home would put a sizable dent in your portfolio. Depending on if you took a mortgage or not, you should still be able to make it work, but it would be such a drastic change to your financials that it’s probably something that’s stopping you.
A decent, safe 1 bedroom 1 bath apartment in Toronto for $1600? What area of the city is this? Also as your child grows, won’t you need a 2 bedroom, or at least a 1 bed + den that could be converted to a second bedroom?
I rent a good size bachelor in Downtown Toronto for $1,033.00 per month (water and heat included, I just have to pay for the internet), just a few steps from Yonge/Bloor.
I have rent control too, so no more than a 2.5% rent increase every year.
I walk to the office (15 min walk) and therefore save on transportation and lunch meals (since I go home for lunch).
So yes it’s possible Firecracker and Wanderer do rent a 1 bedroom in Downtown Toronto for $1,600.00 per month.
I’m on team Own.
But really, I am on team “think clearly about your situation and what will work best for you.” Which involves mathing shit up, which this site loves, but also thinking carefully about your own life, which this site seems to do quite well.
On the “math shit up” side, here in the US the common rule of thumb is that owning becomes a better financial decision when you own for a longer period of time. Five years is typically considered the break even point, but there are some calculators that can help you compare. This depends highly on having a fixed rate loan. I’m not certain that you could reliably compare renting with a variable rate loan unless there were some strict limits on how much variation was allowed.
Also on the “math shit up” side of the equation, is knowing what regional costs are like. I suspect that it is rarely a good financial decision to buy a home in a place like New York City.
There are also many considerations on the “think clearly about your own life” side of the equation. How long do you expect to live in a place? Are you actually handy at all and do you have time to work on your own place? That sort of thing.
A home is not a purely financial situation either which muddies the analysis. What you may financially save by renting you lose also in the emotional investment you’ll never give into a place precisely because you do not own it.
Few renters will go all out in maintaining the condition of a home or in customizing the home to truly make it theirs. This is probably a value that will never be unlocked unless you own.
However, this is more likely classified as a consumption expense rather than an investment one as is typically framed in rent versus buy arguments. It’s easy to lump that in with it and get tunnel visioned not to see this value in “home” but sometimes it’s helpful to consider that more as a consumption and understand that value you get out of it and that will never be had as a renter. So not purely an apples to apples comparison
When Covid brought my nomadic lifestyle to a screeching halt, I decided that sheltering in place in Toronto was preferably than the restrictions imposed by the country I was in, so I returned to Canada. I needed a place to live and was on the fence about owning or renting, so I looked for both simultaneously.
I bumped up against some barriers when looking for a place to rent which I haven’t heard you discuss and am curious as to how you go around them. I was asked to provide employment slips, which I didn’t have because I’m FIRE’d. When they found out I didn’t have a job, they asked for pension slips, which I didn’t have because I don’t collect a pension. So they asked me for tax assessment forms to prove income, which didn’t help because my annual income is low because I don’t need the money so I leave it invested – and landlords were not interested in renting to someone who only has a taxable annual income of ~ 40K. They didn’t give a shit what my net worth was as far as the landlords were concerned I didn’t have enough income to pay the monthly rent.
I ended up buying a place because when you show up with a bag full of cash, the only people who ask questions are the CRA, and only to ask if the money is being laundered.
So how did you convince a landlord, in a competitive rental market like Toronto, that you can afford their place, when you have no employment slips to show them?
Hi Veronica,
Can’t speak directly to Toronto, but currently renting in London, UK in similar situation. I just paid the rent upfront for the lease term.
Hard to argue you can’t pay something when you already did!
I’ll turn 66 in August. I’ve owned many properties. Now that I’m older, I have zero interest in owning ever again! I’ve been happily renting since 2014! FREEDOM!
I appreciate all the discourse, everyone! Kristi and Bryce, thank you for all you contribute! Been following Jim Collins since 2011! I don’t recall exactly when I discovered millennial-revolution but appreciate yourselves and everyone’s contributions to the F.I.R.E./F.I. Community! Blessings, all!
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Because it is absolutely the most convenient option! I travel to the UAE often, and also rent a flat instead of buying it. First of all, because you change and your needs change likewise. You can have more babies. Your neighbors can be annoying. Rent makes you free of any ties. If you dislike something, you just find another place, that’s all. I also like to use a rent now pay later option to be independent of deposits and other bad terms that are sometimes present in Dubai because the market is overheated.
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While I have mostly rented my entire adult life, I believe you have to consider both the math and the availability of rentals. In West Australia, we have seen such a huge increase in rental cost and reduction in availability of rentals that if possible, it makes more sense to own than to rent to avoid having to compete with 500+ applicants for the same rental that has increased in cost by 73% over the past 5 years.
The rent vs buy decision has to be based on what works for you, what your priorities are, and what you can afford. Both are perfectly acceptable, you just have to do the math and enter knowing what you are getting yourself into.
While I have mostly rented my entire adult life, I believe you have to consider both the math and the availability of rentals. In West Australia, we have seen such a huge increase in rental cost and reduction in availability of rentals (0.7% vacancy rate) that if possible, it makes more sense to own than to rent to avoid having to compete with 500+ applicants for the same rental that has increased in cost by 73% over the past 5 years.
The rent vs buy decision has to be based on what works for you, what your priorities are, and what you can afford. Both are perfectly acceptable, you just have to do the math and enter knowing what you are getting yourself into.
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